I work from home, so you would think a Monday wouldn't feel as terrible to me as it does for most people who have a 9 to 5 job. But when you throw in the fact that it's a 4 day weekend for other military families and you get this constant reminder that your husband is deployed and can't bbq with you and friends like everyone else is doing, you have a tendency to get a really bad case of the Mondays.
The really crappy thing, is lately every day has felt like a Monday that will never end. You know the movie Groundhog Day with Bill Murray? That is what my life feels like. Same day over and over. I wish I could take a cue from Bill and learn a little bit every day to improve upon my mistakes to have a wonderful outcome at the end.
My big problem is I am NOT a morning person. So I go to bed pumping myself up "you can do this!! Tomorrow is a new day! You will get up and......" (fill in the blanks with everything I want to change) And then I wake up. And am depressed all over again, don't want to wake up and get out of bed. Quickly find excuses to NOT do all of the things I had pumped myself up to do the night before. Granted this last week hasn't helped much being sick and feeling like total crap.
So this morning I woke up, took a shower, made my coffee and grabbed my laptop. I had planned in my head to just get up and get out of the house and go SOMEWHERE....ANYWHERE! But all I can think right now is how completely exhausted I am and want to go back to sleep. I can barely keep my eyes open and I've only been awake for an hour. Then to top it off I haven't stopped sweating since I got out of the shower. Gotta love anxiety =P
I think my first step to getting rid of the Mondays is to stop comparing myself to everyone else. So what if I sleep until 9:30 and you get up at 6:00 -- So what if I relax all morning and drink coffee until noon and you've already done all of your shopping, cleaning, and have had breakfast and lunch...I need to find what works for ME. What MY schedule should be. I work from home for a reason. I set my own schedule, work when and IF I want to. I am my own boss. Now I need to transfer that thinking over to my personal life. I wish it was easier to stop worrying about what other people think of me. And the likelihood that they even care I'm sure is very slim.
So today Monday, you may have the upper hand. But we'll meet again soon. And maybe, just maybe...you'll feel more like a Tuesday.
Woah.. I feel like I could have written this! Minus the deployed hubby =P But I do know how you feel to some extent. I feel the same way at times about working from home and about saying I'm going to get up and do this and that and this and then quickly finding excuses not to!
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